Sunday 14 August 2011

Doctor Who: The Impossible Astronaut: First Draft Parody Script

A great start to the new series. Here's a parody review.




Opens with a the Doctor having lots of fun as he goofs around through history

Rory
The Doctor sure seems to be enjoying himself without us. Why did he leave us here again?

Amy
So that we can have fun alone as a married couple… in this village that I find really dull.

Rory
Great isn’t it?

Amy
Hooray we got a Doctor like invitation. Lets get out of here.

*****

Doctor
Howdy Ponds I wear a Stetson now. Stetsons are cool.

Audience
Yes they are.

River Song
Well I disagree. *Bang*

Rory
That was ridiculously dangerous. Bad River!

River Song
Sorry Rory.

*****

Doctor
Let’s check our diaries.

Rory
How quaint we find smart phones work better.

River Song
We keep meeting each other in the wrong time order. Synchronisation would be a nightmare.

They go to lake Powell for a picnic.

Rory
Look! An Apollo astronaut is walking out of the lake. Impossible!

Amy
Compared to being erased from time, being turned into a robot and then seeing the universe rebooted?

Rory
Ok good point. Well it killed the Doctor that’s impossible.

River Song
Clearly but it will make for a good mystery for the run of this series.

*****



Doctor
Hello sorry to keep you waiting I was just in the restroom shower. What’s wrong with your faces you look like you’ve shared a bad dream.

Amy
I don’t understand.

River Song
Come on Amy this show is about time travel, work it out.

Amy
The new audience River. Think about the new audience.

Doctor
Right we’re landing in the Whitehouse in 1969 rather than parking somewhere discreet like I usually do. I’ll turn the Tardis invisible. Although it is a big drain on power.

River Song
Compared to travelling across millions of light years?

Doctor
Give me a break Star Trek has the same problem.

The Doctor exits into the Oval office and looks confused at being exactly where he planned to be.

President Nixon
How did you get in here? Canton get your gun out.

Canton
No. I’m too curious.

Doctor
Don’t arrest us. I can sort out those nuisance calls you’re getting.

President Nixon
You can put on call blocking?

Doctor
Well yes… but I think rescuing a girl and saving the world would be far more interesting. Now from these maps I can tell where she is.

Rory
How quaint we use google maps which is far mor…

Doctor
Quite you.

They travel with Canton to a creepy abandoned building.

Doctor
Look at all this cool retro space gear.

River Song
Come on Doctor we’re on a mission. Oh I can’t wait I’ll check out this dangerous underground space ship alone… Woah scary looking aliens I’ll have to turn around and tell the others… something.?

Rory
So you saw nothing?

River Song
Yep come on down. It’s time I got to know you better.

*****

Canton
Bigger on the inside I accept that. But Dr Who exactly?

Amy
That’s the first time the series title has been spoken in a way that feels natural. Shame we have to have all the other references though.

Girl
Help!

Amy
Doctor wait I need to tell you something really important.

Doctor
So important you didn’t tell me 5 minutes ago?

Amy
I’m pregnant.

Doctor
That could have waited.

Amy
Not for this dramatic ending.

Bang!


 
Copyright © Nathan Groves http://wondersandparodies.blogspot.com/
This Work Is Not To Be Reproduced With Out Permission.
Image property of the bbc

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